Days in the Wild...

It is but human,that we take so many things for granted.So when i was thrust into the responsibility of maintaining my apartment for a few days,with my parents outta town,i dint think much of it.But after the experience,i will have to drastically change that view.
So lemme give you a 12 point guideline in case such a situation happens to you.

#1 . Ensure that you have an extra toothpaste tube.Squeezing the tube is infinitely easier than expending your entire body weight into the tube without any effect resulting in drastic measures like cutting the tube with a kitchen knife and scraping the paste out.

#2. Remember,one can survive on a strict diet of bread,jam,sauce and water.To add variety to your meals,use different permutations of the 4 items.Use jam and sauce in moderation,or u may need a second meal sooner than you think.

#3 If an adventurous spirit hits you,and you get the inspiration to cook,calm down.Let the feeling pass..If you still want to continue,remember your last cooking experiment,the excruciating pain in your stomach,the hospital,your dead pet,and the fire in the kitchen.If you are still intent,may god be with you.

#4 Find the kitchen in your house.Once inside the place,survey the various strange looking instruments,and hopefully if good sense prevails,you will be back watching TV in no time.

#5 Once you decide to cook,ensure that you NEVER try your cooking experiments on yourself.God provides us with neighbours,especially the troublesome ones for precisely this purpose.Present your "cooked" food to your neighbour("oh such a sweet boy,we should invite him for dinner" (u have your treat)),If he does not come back to invite you,pray for his health..

#6 During multitasking in the kitchen,remember that the time required for boiling milk may not match exactly with time for tv commercials.

#7 If in the mess called your room,you need to find something invaluable (eg..the TV remote),
do not search for it.You know that you are never gonna find it.You can hence avoid a lot of frustration.So believe in the power of fate.If it is meant to be,it will be found.

#8 Improvise,Adapt.If u overboiled the rice,add sugar and present the "pudding" to ur neighbours.I

#9 When the kitchen starts reeking of bad smell,and u notice a pile of unwashed utensils because of ur "cooking",and u notice insect colonies being formed,do NOT panic.Time for desperate action.Bolt the kitchen door tight,and if the smell still seeps through,spray AXE near the door.Isolate the kitchen from the habitable parts of ur house.Remember,when civilization comes back,(to be read as mom),sanctity will be restored.It is just the matter of surviving a few days.

#10 Possibly you will notice that the other rooms become inhabitable day by day so repeat the process of isolating the habitable parts from the smelly parts,and you will finally be trapped in your living room with your best friend,your TV

#11 Use this alone time to think about your life,think about the universe.Relive your memories.
and when the power comes back go back to watching TV.

#12 After surviving in the wild,and when civilized people come back home( i mean the 4 locked doors with an empty bottle of AXE),do not stay around too much for them to survey the disaster.Let them vent their fury on the utensils,and the rooms.

Engineering:Redefined

I am back....(i can hear people sighing..i can see my orkut friends grumbling,my gmail contacts swearing,"DAMN it,hez back)."Two months of peace,and the guy comes back to force comments and feedback".I can hear the blogosphere bells ringing(What!!..).To all my gmail contacts ,my orkut friends,this time i won't beg and plead for comments,through online messages.
I have turned over a new leaf.I am going in for a new sms service that updates all my friends when i blog,i eat,sleep..."ullas samachar".
The fact that i have 2-3 numbers for each person makes the task difficult though..So what do i blog about.So why the long gap in blogging.I was procrastinating(My word of the day..).In simple terms,i was too damn lazy...So what do i blog about.?I have covered sports,made a feeble attempt to do a rajdeep sardesai,and review current affairs(which resulted in rotten tomatoes,and eggs thrown at me online..),used humour as a mechanism to show the world how "cool" i am.Typed in crap that people saw,and for the first time realized that they were not that weird.Typed in crap to show people that i am weird,because weird people are supposed to be cool,and everyone wants to be cool.Read my posts ,laughed because it was so NOT funny,that "that" made me laugh..
So what will i blog about.And then the realization hit me.I pondered and pondered(my second word of the day),put two and two together.I was seven eighth of an engineer(why ,ullas,why do u need to use fractions!!),and pretty bad one at that.I am basically sarcastic.so putting one and three together,i have been enlightened.All i got to do is to write about what some engineering terms really mean to me,(and by "me",i mean the vast majority of this growing species).So after almost 4 years of intense research,these are my conclusions.

THE DRAFTER

Carpenters have tools,Celebrities have fake boobs,Pratibha Patil has her foreign tours,and we have our Drafters.One of the most interesting tools in the engineering kit.Most of us are not aware of itz use,however.Some carry it around like a mace(drafter on shoulder routine),some carry it around like a machine gun.Me,i make firing sounds,and use it to "kill" my imaginary villians.Pkshah..Pkshah..(the weird sound..water in my gun)...crack...(R.I.P,Dear Drafter)

THE COLLEGE ID CARD

Thanks to some "amazing" friends of mine,i haven't seen this thing after first year.They say that students are supposed to carry it around.They even make ridiculous claims that the card is compulsory.For my part,i will never lay eyes upon it ever again(thanks to my wonderful friends),and the only proof that i am a student will be my sleepy eyes,my torn bag,and the prison grey shirt,with inscriptions of various kinds (again thanks to my friends).

THE INTERNALS

It is the time of the sem when you realize the number of subjects you have,get to know the full forms of the subjects(try to,atleast),search your entire house for your library card(only to realize that library cards do not grow out of trees,and that you gotta apply for them).And the day before the exam,you realize that the text you bought for 400 rupees contains just the introduction,and then you run around hostels,wait in queues at the photostat shops,and finally when you collect the entire material in a 100 seperate scraps of sheets,you are too tired,and realize that you should have studied the introduction.So on the D-day,morning,you absorb in few words remotely related to the subject,write sheets and sheets of crap with the mention of the aforesaid words in BOLD CAPITALS,emphasising its importance,also caring to write the remaining words in a highly illegible manner(which comes naturally to me,btw).This time is also gala time for the photostat shops (which compress large textbooks into tiny portable pieces of information with a free rubberband) .The compression rates are so drastic that guys carry entire chapters of textbooks in their socks.The power of technology applied here to great effect.

SEMINARS

Deeply enlightening sessions of puffs and pepsi,with students blabbering stuff during the break.
I strongly feel that the time for puffs and pepsi is over.We need to usher in a new way..Bring on the Biriyani,Bring on the milk shake.Apart from eating,seminars basically mean,the teachers are given their own medicine.It is their turn to sit through incredibly boring lectures.I distinctly remember one teacher sleeping through mine.I was proud....

TO BE CONTINUED..

PS:Too tired of creating bad jokes....will come back later to maim,trouble and harass..

Inspire '08

"Standing preponderent,embellished in glory,Inspire is back"To cut the crap(CTC),Inspire is back,BIGGER and BETTER.To those who dont know abt Inspire,the biggest technical festival in kerala(I am not kidding!,for a change)...Inspire is the BIGGEST technical festival in kerala( Do i see a few raised eyebrows..),conducted by the computer science department of Cusat.And in 5 years,itz going to raise the standards,and be one among the Biggies in India(Just an assumption seeing the phenomenal growth rate)..For a fact,the prize money is attaining phenomenal growth.The number of events is increasing at approximately the same rate.
So what happens in Inspire?.With a whole host of robotic events,inspire is going HI -FI,this time around.Mechanical humans battling it out in the football field(Robosoccer),and block moving robots is a sure bet to attract crowds.How often does robots play soccer?.And for the programming wizards ,there is the "complete programmer".And For the real wizards(the people who have mastered 8085..this micro is totally greek to me),therez the 8085 programming contest.Catering to our policy to cater to the artists in you,we have web designing.
A very brilliant innovation in inspire this time around is the introduction of online events.So for all those people who are glued to the million social networking websites available(i am no exception),take 30 mins off,take www.acesinspire.com,click on the links,win some solid cash(talking in thousands here),go back to those million social networking sites,and have fun.
My personal favourite,the "Complete professional" where the contestants are subjected to intense verbal duels.Fun for the audience,definitely.The contestants will have their share of the fun when they lay their hands on the fat cash pack.With Arul Mani (yes,THE arul mani,the man ranked as the best quizzer in india) setting up the questions,quoting from a hardcore quizzer friend "every tom,dick and harry of quizzing will be there".So without a shadow of doubt,the quiz is a sure shot success.It will be the best teams in kerala battling it out for top honours.And Then we have gaming,the adrenaline rush,people screaming out,the keyboards getting a battering of a lifetime,yes itz all there.So stop reading my blog,and register at www.acesinspire.com.
See you all there

PS:If the post seems to be like a brochure,then pardon
PPS:I don't need to apologize,this is my personal space.

The Same Story.

You could congratulate him for his very "noble" effort which resulted in ousting the 20th century hitler mr saddam,and establishing democracy in the state of iraq(translated into layman's terms as "OIL..More OIL".)You could blame him for his immensely horrible spellings.But the fact remains...After 9/11,the United States have not seen a terrorist attack of even a small magnitude.They have succeeded in their "war on terror".And India...Without quoting facts and figures,India is definitely the hot destination for the masked villians.The latest city to bear the brunt,the capital city.
So who is the latest scapegoat?.Well,the respected home minister was seen with 3 different pairs of clothes,the media gets turned "on",Shivraj patil for his personal hygiene is the root cause of all the problems.Shivraj patil puts on a new pair of clothes,and lo..a terror attack.Sonia Gandhi calls up an urgent cabinet meeting.She chides mr patil for his hygiene,and announces a new law that prevents cabinet ministers from changing clothes.Laluji is all for it.He rejoices in his own style,adding a new cow to his household.The PM unfortunately, could not attend the meeting,because of his nuclear deal commitments.But "Sonia's Wish is my command".
Jokes aside,Patil,unfortunately ultimately is the scapegoat.So what should change.The government?.Will a change of power reverse the situation.Itz the same biscuit in a new packet(forgive me for the bad analogy).New ,harsh antiterror laws ,which modi has been vocal about?.No,human rights violation is entirely unjustifiable.As they say"You can let a 100 villains free,but never let an innocent man suffer". new laws is not the answer,rather itz the way the existing laws are implemented,that needs to be undergo a change.A proposed federal structure on the model of FBI?.Definitely a very good idea,unless the red tape does not intervene.
Does the world really need another 9/11 to awake itself.I hope not.

BPL,a new season

I did exceed all my expectations.My order of laziness is second to none.If u had checked out my previous post,i had promised myself,a post everyday....ah well...Those who are really interested in english football may continue.Others may go back to being jobless.
The transfer market is finally closed,the deals done in the boardroom,now the real deal to be settled in the green square.The BPL is back with a new name, lots of new faces ,but the same,if not bigger ,dose of entertainment.All the teams did change,some for the better,some for the worse.2 games gone in the season,and we have had 2 manager casualities already curbishley,and keegan.Newcastle has fired iits 1768th manager in as many days.Stability is something that is beyond them.Every season,we expect great things from them,but with unwavering consistency,they disappoint.Itz high time ,they realize the importance of a stable backroom staff.
Curbishley,fair to him,did not deserve the sacking,as well.Yes,his transfer market forays were not entirely successful,but he definitely deserved some more time.He has proved himself as a sturdy professional with charlton,so i definitely think he will bounce back.
The perennial pretenders Tottenham..Well ,all the indications from their perfomances ,point to another season of pretending."Almost" there..but not yet there,Unless Juande Ramos manages to conjure up some magic from his sevilla experiences,marcus bent shows us why he was worth more than Henry!!,and Ledley King manages to stay fit for atleast half the season!!,tottenham is set for another "Almost" season.The biggest news of the summer undoubtedly is the manchester city takeover.A billionaire owner,and bids are already being made for kaka,fabregas,ronaldo(the portugese one,not the useless one),with robinho putting ink to paper for a massive 57 mil.Whether the lesser known manchester side becomes another chelsea or another leeds united,only time will tell.The premier league is turning out to be a hot destination for billionaires nowadays,first chelsea,now mancity.The prospect of money controlling glory is not really a heartwarming prospect for true soccer addicts.
The top four,and chelsea with roman power has really added strength with the addition of portugese maestro deco.Deco ,going by his perfomances,is set to capture the limelight.The reds,have had a quite summer relatively,breaking bank just for the bulgarian frontman berbatov.Definitely a great addition,but the best piece of business for them would have been keeping cristiano.Gunners true to their nature have bought in a 17 year old in aaron ramsey,and a 20 year old in nasri.The fact that these youngsters learn their trade in a very condusive atmosphere in arsenal,and when the deal is done,and they become the finished product,they move on to seemingly "greener" pastures,and ruin themselves,does not stop wenger from breeding these young geniuses.Flamini ,to take a name warmed the bench for 3 years,and finally when he made his mark last season,he opts to move out.Hleb blames the climate and moves for barcelona.The climate!!..wtf,itz all about the money.But wenger,the genius he is,will still be expecting great things from his very very young side,and hopefully they will be able to deliver silverware this time around.Whatever happens,the football is great,and thatz the only thing,i care.

PS: Happy onam to all..

The adventure on wheels...

Yes.Private Buses in cochin are more fun than any amusement park in the world.My life is full of adventure.Every single day is an adventure.The moment i step onto the bus,i become spiritual,i pray,i never look at the road,i pray again,and the moment i step from the bus,i thank god for making me still in one single piece.I have been lucky for the past 3 years,incredibly lucky.
The moment,u step onto the bus(which basically means getting a fingerhold..) u remain focussed,ur only aim ,to come out alive.Once u r inside the bus (with the help of a hundred thousand pushpulls,and a not so occasional steptoes) u dissolve into the bus.u and the bus becomes a single entity.u feel every jerk,every single pothole,every single sudden brake.u r subjected to the most intense aerobics session,where ur body gets atleast 3 complete rotations,in a single minute.The fact that therez a top secret, big money race between every single bus driver in cochin(thatz the only plausible explanation!!) does not help ur cause one bit.The bus that wins usually is my bus...(i am so damn lucky that i am still here to type this stuff..!!)
I guess the prize money is really really high.Bus is king.The driver is the emperor.I never prefer to sit near the window.Not just because,of the incredibly 'clean' air and the 'perfumed' smell in kaloor,but also because the approx distance between 2 buses travelling together is 1 inch.Then i become part of 2 buses.i can sense the sudden brakes,and the jerks of 2 buses.My pain is quadrupled,my fear octapled(is the word valid?),and my sense of adventure hexapled.When the bus reaches ur stop,u think that the adventure is over.If u attack the final phase of ur bus journey with complacency,u r doomed.Stepping or jumping out of the bus requires precision,and dare.Kerala tourism should really start promoting this as an adventure sport.

PS:I guess i did go too far,but the bus ride i had today was the greatest adventure of my life,to date.

Evolution..A Theory.

This is basically a very unprofessional,unethical,and a nonsensical perspective of evolution.Since senor charles darwin already found out the evolutionary cycle of humans,i intend to decipher the science of evolution of a sub species..(a dominant sub species ,especially in india),an engineering student.Since,the no of engineering colleges is increasing by the rate of one every second,and the people who actually know something about the engineering sciences are on the verge of extinction,special interest has been pouring in regarding engineering students.A study states that within a hundred years,if u throw a stone into space,the probability that it will hit an engineer is almost equal to one.So the study of the evolution process has been gaining steady interest.Since the study is absolutely rubbish,and i am fed up of following any format,the effort would be totally unprofessional.
Basically there are 4 stages in the evolution of an engineering student.The 4 stages,or the 4 years.I intend to describe the evolution process with some terms loosely connected to engineering.

Appearance
First Stage:u get to see ironed clothes,polished shoes,and dress that is officially your uniform.Unpolished shoes are frowned upon.Anything remotely "non" uniform is treated with utmost severity.Teachers tend to be dangerous species.Fear tends to be the dominant emotion.

Second Stage: Ironed clothes slowly moving out of fashion.Some distinct shades of the "official" colour appearing.Polished shoes frowned upon.The id card that was an integral part of ur uniform in the first stage disappears.Eyes are usually sleepy.New trends of haircuts start appearing,ranging from 'plain dumb' to 'awesome'.

Third Stage:Ironed clothes are history.The shades become intense,so much so that the 'official'
colour of the uniform cannot be traced.Each individual possesses a different shade.the word 'uniform' becomes obsolete.Smell always associated with the uniforms,and believe me..the smell is not pleasant.Haircuts are a thing of the past.ID card is buried in the sands of time,never ever to be recovered.

Fourth Stage.The pair nearest to ur bed is ur uniform.The colours dont matter."WHAT ID CARD?"

Mode of transport

First year:Legs..Cycles are a breathtaking sight.Bikes are out of this world.The college bus is the keyword.

Second Year:Bikes arrive on the scene.A second hand bike is a luxury."50 kmph..wow..awesome man..".Bus is still the keyword though in most cases.But bus is not "THE" thing.

Third Year:New Bikes.Old Cars.College bus is a rare sight.Speed limits become high.No of accidents proportionally increase.Fines become increasingly frequent,pockets increasingly light,parents proportionally angry.

Fourth Year: Car becomes a necessity.The maximum distance u can cover with ur legs is 50 metres.Anything beyond that leads to severe stress related problems.A 100 metre fourth year is a rare sight.Mistaken impression that the college bus has stopped service.Petrol bills cause of misery and hunger."Dude...Itz 100 kmph,u duffer...press the accelerator ,man!!.."

Tools Used

First year: A neatly arranged instrument box with 4 pens, red pen for underlining.All the necessary drawing tools.The college bag with a book for each subject.A time table card!!.
A thick heavy nokia handset.

Second Year:2 pens neatly arranged at the bottom of ur bag.A broken protractor that serves as the drawing tool.The college bag considerably lighter.The thick heavy phone replaced by a slimmer lighter phone.The time table is revealed by the person in the first stage of his evolution beside u.

Third Year: A single pen in ur pocket.Blood on ur fingers due to the sharp tip of the pen,while the pen is been dug out from itz tomb.A single book neatly divided 6 times for each subject on ur
hand. The time table is revealed gradually as the day progresses,by the teachers themselves.

Fourth Year:No pen or anything remotely concerned with scribing.Fortunately,u r satisfied easily..a refill will do..even a sharp tipped compass is good enough.Your book for the day(the one that u saw first,lying on ur table incidentally resembling kublai khan's latest exploits) neatly tucked into ur pants."Who cares about the time table".A high definition camera,an mp3 player,a web browser,also supposedly used for calling up people, always with u.

Behavioral Traits and Examination Syndrome

First Year:As described,fear dominant emotion.Tensions before the exams.Hours of study and revision.Internals is greeted with fear,and externals with pure horror.Teachers are treated with respect and fear.Assignments are punctually done.Attendance is close to 100 percent,and u curse urself if u miss a class.

Second Year: Fear gives way to arrogance.Night outs become rare.Revision is looked down upon.Intenals are treated with ease,but the externals are treated with respect.Assignments are punctually done by the first years(in terms of evolution),and copied with accuracy by the second
years.Attendance in cinema halls ,all time high.

Third Year: Night Outs become extinct.Internals are treated with grins,and externals with pure joy.50 pages assignments are condensed into 3 page assignments by the second years,and they are further condensed by the third years.Avoiding condonation becomes an objective.

Fourth Year:"Whatz the exam today,mate?"..

Though i have classified the various stages by time,usually anomalies happen.
Some people are completely evolved ,the moment they step onto college.A whole new evolutionary cycle needs to be created for these guys.Some,on the other hand never evolve.
Some guys reach unknown realms of evolution.But these gems are hard to find.So what stage of evolution are you in(pointing my finger at you)..??..

PS:A TV show type ending..my longest blog till date..

Vacations..

Another blogging experiment ensues...
Vacations have been so damn boring that i have heard all songs from 'lovestory 2050' a million times,have tried learning spanish,tried to compose a book with myself as the central character..and finally the book(incidentally 3 pages) came out to be a glorius mixture of indiana jones ,lord of the rings,and catch-22.I can still recollect a sequence in which i was surrounded by 35 dramingos(my version of dementers)and with the help of my elf friend came out unscathed..and incidentally the only weapon i had was a whip.With this terrible experiment,i came to the conclusion that i am worthy only for writing crap blogs.Learning spanish was also interesting.It lasted exactly 3 days 22 hrs,since the learning tapes took up too much hard disk space, i may never go to spain and hook up with a spanish girl,my spanish will never make my english sexy,and my mom found me annoying since i was trying my spanish on her.She dutifully reminded me that my english was bad enough.So another lesson taught.You may never end up in a latin country with a hot chic(Puff!!..there goes another dream down the drain). So basically i have fulfilled my dreams .I have had a vacation.I havent done anything useful or productive by ANY means.i have slept like a log day and night..I haven't touched (literally) any book remotely related to college(no,not even the bus pass).S6 books remain on my table reminding me of a sacred relic untouched,but the table itself looks like the warfield of chenghiz khan.NO MERCY..whatsoever.
But i think i have inflicted more punishment on my computer.I would never like to be my computer.She has suffered a lot.Viruses from every part of the universe have attacked her.I have never tried to protect her.But she has never complained.She is still soldering on bravely.Though slowly,but steadily her time is nearing.I should mourn for her,but the insensitive brute i am,i never will.My keyboard has suffered equally.Every key has been battered and bruised by my gmail account.I feel sorry for the people who are inmy chat list.They would be uttering my name in their sleep.I am ALWAYS online.I am so utterly butterly jobless that i experimented cooking.I was thrown out of the kitchen though.Seems being bored does not necessarily mean u can cook.I have vowed to never enter the kitchen for anything other than eating(forced out of my mouth by a very disgruntled mom).
I am so utterly butterly jobless(i should think abt writing a poem) that i am writing reviews for the films i have seen,and the books i have read.I intend to byheart a list of names (classic books) for the pleasure of the intelligent chics( which some say are 'real',though no living proof has yet been found).In the mean time,i plan to read calvin hobbes,tintin and archies.Sitting through a classic movie has never been painful for me since it involves sitting in a nice couch,staring at a screen ,all the time concentrating on the bag of chips in ur hand.So basically i did watch a lot of classics.
TV has been a great experience for me. 80+ channels and i discover that i am not interested in any.I did watch Friends a couple of zillion million times,and can quote jokes out of it.I did watch the baweja kid with weird clothes dancing to pretty poor music in front of pink haired priyanka in a movie titled lovestory 2050 ,a zillion times.
The fact that atleast a single person got through to the end of this blog reminds me.I am not ALONE.Welcome buddy.

PS: thanks sabith for the inspiration...

Back To The Future..

Year 2020

Venue:Cusat(also to be declared as IIIIET(expansion ,frankly is too long)itz not yet official,but will happen within an YEAR or so)

I walk in and see faint "romeos" etched across the switchboard,the electrical wiring,works of the class "artist" and realizes,i was back..back to my college after 10 years.So many things have changed ,yet so much is still the same.The benches are still the same,the encryptions bearing testimony to our college life,some "unfortunate" drawings still etched on to the benches....

It was the first alumni meet conducted by our college.I had recieved the letter a month ago,and was plain excited to meet my old mates,most of whom i had lost correspondence with,excited to see how they have changed,how they have not.And here i was,in the best classroom i have ever been..room no 18.So many familiar faces surround me..Familiar faces..a few celebrities as well.The class representative ,nerd Sandeep(IDEA star singer,2016) had thrown his well paid job away,and was into playback singing,making a great living out of it.Some ppl had changed after all.

The Dubai man as we used to fondly call him was indeed literally a "dubai" man,earning in lakhs,driving around the latest offering from Tata Royce.But sanju had not changed,well apart from the slightly balding forehead,he still came up with the most atrocious jokes ,which we still found funny,btw.I could spot nesha,kutts and neetu having an animated conversation,probably reminiscing..nesha had turned out to be quite a famous anchor and with her multicultural background ,was hosting shows all over south india!!.

Another "celebrity" walks up to me ,breaking into a grin,Mr S.Vasudevan formerly known simply as sanoop,sporting a stylish bulgan, was a highy paid film critic(paid to watch movies!!).Here was a guy,who actually loved his job.!!.. With horn-rimmed glasses,and hair tied up like a bun,sunita really did transform herself from a soft spoken ,helpful girl to a powerful lady,an integral cog in a corporate machine,keeping her innumerable assistants on their toes,barking orders left,right and center..People do change...

But some never change..Half an hour LATE,another familiar face walks in,but now he is the chief animator of a big time studio producing movies of the likes of Shrek 14,but the credits never show his name,why,because he is too damn lazy to attend any meeting..I could spot few of my northie friends nitish,nikesh,pandey and co having a good time.They were all accompanied by their beautiful 'biwis'....Sumesh,true to his tastes, had opened up a chain of gymnasiums over the state,and was raking in lots of cash..

Ryan,(who incredibly did not ask me for any treat!!..) had turned out to be involved in gaming(no suprises there!..),and sreeni ,alongside him was working in a reputed firm.
All of us,were in fact doing well.But we were all missing college life.Those 4 years of "hell".And as i walked into my classroom,all those memories came back...the "amazing" free periods,the silly crushes,some strong friendships,some silly fights(NOT the head banging ones!!..).Friendships stronger than steel were forged here,friendships that withstood the test of time.
The 4 years had changed us all,in some way,but finally we were left with the memories ..When i looked around the room,i felt a sense of grief..we all did..
Ultimately,we were never gonna get back those 4 years...

PS: When i am murdered(which i will be in the near future),i do NOT want the CBI investigating the case..the background music irritates me....though TV coverage will be kinda cool...hmm..

A Hectic Month!!!...Sixth Semester has been a whirlwind ride!!..The first internals come,and they literally knock u off ur feet,leaving u breathless,and suddenly u realize that the deadline of ur project rough report is the next day,and u sit and type a whole load of crap (Owe it to my groupmates who have been tremendously "supportive",one (unfortunately my best friend) is still excited that he did the cover page and the title page ,the other frankly was unaware of any project whatsoever(who.,.what project..???),and the third member blissfuly escaped...So Finally I had to type 30 pages of crap ,and then realize that my format was wrong..What the heck is wrong with font size 14??!!!..So aftr 30 pages of shit, lot of swearing,i was back to ground zero.
Oh By the way,small matter of placements were going on side by side.Lady luck favoured me there,and i did land myself with a job.So i have to "sell my soul" to TCS,well who cares,i want the money.The interview process was fun,especially the part where i had to sell myself.Sincere,Confident,Talented,Motivated,Commited(Woah i did say a lot of crap..pls god forgive me..!!).I guess I could say a lot more.HR was a good guy(his only disqualification being,he was a Man.U Fan)Well i guess i could forgive him,after all he did not eliminate me.A great week for cricket as well,with the teens and the men making india proud.Better week for Arsenal Fans,yeah we knocked off the champions of europe. A Week of confessions....
Well thats all,i guess since tomorrow i have another set of internals,and writing personal anecdotes wont help me pass Data/Digital Signal Processing(I am not sure bout the full form..).
PS:I guess my first personal blog...nice..

101 ways to mess up an interview

This blog has come a bit late,since i had my last interview months ago.But Better late than never.It is never too late to inflict your cruel bad jokes on ur poor readers,who will undoubtedly sit through this crap,because well..they are damned bored.So kindly note :Read this ONLY if u r BORED.Get the boredom out of ur system,let it make way for irritation,but please do not vent those feelings of "Oh i want to kill myself " feelings on my blog which unfortunately has a "comments" section .Frankly i am fed up of using that "delete" button.
So here goes..

101 was a bit of an exaggeration,but from my personal experience and also with help of some anecdotes from my collegues,i have compiled a small list and do's and don'ts.So read through.If u find it useful,well and good..otherwise u have wasted ur time reading a stupid list.Go and do something useful for a change...

• Do not be under the illusion that praising the HR will do u any good.I learnt that the hard way ,of course.Stereotyped questions,and Stereotyped answers.This is what an interview is basically.So in order to break the monotony,i ventured a different answer to the all so familiar question"where do u see urself 5 years from now??".I guess i should have said the stereotyped answer"project manager..blah blah..blah..".But NO..I had to say that i wanted to be in the HR department(Damn!!...why,ullas why?!!).Now this small statement was preceded by queries regarding the various intricacies of the HR department(I had different answers here also,ranging from "I am not aware,sir",to "I am not sure sir",To"I guess i should learn a bit more about man management",To"I am sorry sir".)So with the HR episode he was satisfied that i was no good for HR department.So techies followed.I guess i had a good time in the tech interview where he asked me concepts of networking,and i smiled all the way through,realising how bad a computer engineer i was.But i guess i have to be thankful to him for not giving up on me.C questions followed(Atlast i could say something positive).I did well on the C part,answering most of the questions.So the great ordeal of tech interview was over.


• MR was next and i am still unaware of itz expansion(I have a small notion that itz concerned with management..!!!.)As "luck" would have it,i preceded my college topper,so i guess i should have been prepared with a valid reason for my comparitively low marks in first year.And dutifully,she enquired about the reason.And what did i do ,I blabbered on and on about how careless ,and over confident i was(good work ,ullas!!.u r always on ur "game"...) during my first year.I was asked to do a presentation on my favourite subject (which i had found out the day before from a friend of mine!!) .That went off well,i suppose.Apart from the fact that it was difficult to keep a straight face,when the person whom u r "teaching" yawns with a frequency greater than a p IV dual core(Wow..my first nerdish joke ),things went off pretty smoothly.I came out of the room sorry for my teachers who face this ordeal day in day out,and in this case the frequency is massive, a supercomputer( second nerdish joke..i am getting good at this).
• Third round was a walk in the park,where basically i was subject to personal questions and the usual "describe yourself" stuff.A long day finally came to a close.

Well the fact that i tried all the 101 ways prescribed in the " what not to do " book of interviews,and still got the job plainly gives me the creeps.What the hell are they going to do with me.But i guess this blog should give confidence to buddding job hunters.Though i did mess up all the interviews, i messed it up well in a confident manner.I think that did it.

PS : Huge blog,the biggest of the lot by a long distance.(patting myself).I do use these bracket things a lot...hmm..

Fedexing To Glory..

Year:2001,And the Whole of Flushing Meadows bowed to a swiss.He had just won his first grandslam,losing a solitary set on his way to glory.The spectators knew that they were watching someone special,someone who could go on to become great.But little did they know that this guy was going to redefine greatness,But little did the world know that they were witnessing the birth of a STAR.Loosely defined word,but gains a multitude of meaning when referred to this great tennis ICON.No price for guessing!!,the name of this extraordinary swiss maestro,one Mr Roger Federer.

Switzerland represents beauty and style,and roger federer is itz perfect ambassador personifying the calmness of the alps,and the tenacity of the frequenting ice storms,all blended in a perfectly synchronized package.Federer represents all that is good about the sport,in fact he is the perfect ambassador for tennis.At times he brandished his racquet like a sword,while at times his strokes had the perfection only an artist could achieve.Pistol Pete had his serve,Becker had his brute strength,but Federer has his style.In my mind,he is the greatest ever,whether he breaks sampras's record or not.Stastics can speak,but it can never form the bigger picture.It can never describe the perfection of his backhand,the accuracy of his forehand,his Genius.It can never speak for his conduct on and off the field.My words do not do justice to his genius.but all i can say is, federer is the greatest player to grace a tennis court,and will remain so.

Self Analysis..Mission Failure

A New Day..A new post..After a Long gap..ur favourite blogger is back..and back with more humour,more analysis,in short bigger and better (I was born "humble").And I am back to where i started.Typing nonsensical shit.Period

Self Analysis..Something which i found out i could do any second of the day.Something which i could do without getting any attention.Something that ppl rarely do,and they realize that only when they are asked to fill their "about me" in their orkut profile.Some people use that space to make themselves feel important,mysterious.I am not blaming them in any way.Coz orkut is a social networking site,and like any society,people crave popularity,"cool dude" label.That is normal human attitude.Well the crux of the matter is everyone do need recognition,fame,social standing.Well the fact that i am writing this blog bears testimony to that huge fact.Lemme elaborate.In the line before,i could have used "fact of the matter" instead of "crux of the matter",but i did not ..why??..Coz i wanted to flaunt my vocabulary.Some ppl on the other hand use the all so familiar phrase "Find it out",or another one is "I dont know" which i feel is closest to the truth.Please check out my "about me",and u will realize how much little i know of myself.God..me evolving..What a bad piece of humour.
So what should i write about myself???(The all so familiar question)I am certainly not humble ,but not egoistic.I have this particular feeling that i have a great sense of humour,but then some very dear friends of mine always bring me back to earth.But i do still believe that i have a pretty good sense of humour(Fortunately they cannot edit my blog..i am saved).Though i do crack jokes at the wrong time(pretty serious offence..bad timing has caused me much embarassment,and since i am the one who is taking the pains to type,i am not elaborating).I am loyal(something which i am proud of).I feel pretty confident that the comments for this blog would Never be flattering,and i feel pretty lucky that i can edit and delete those comments with ease.But then i know that the comments always remain empty,coz the number of readers is not even a handful.
So I have come to the conclusion that i have boosted myslelf up ,which was the intention of this blog in the first place..!!(Who am i kidding here!!..)..and those people who have had the patience to read this huge mass of crap ,i applaud u.Patience is definitely something that u can write in your "about me"

PS:Wow what an ending(There i have ruined the ending again..why do u need a postscript ullas,why..aren't u tired of ur own jokes!!)..